Merry Christmas!

So, here come the holidays....I just had to tell you how it is around my house....

http://
more animals">

I stopped to take a picture...

I couldn't resist. After dropping Maddie and Bree off at school this morning, I was greeted by the most unusual sign that I have personally experienced. Now, mind you...this is in an area where dogs and cats FREQUENTLY go missing so, a scrawled message and phone number posted is not out of the norm. I also want to stress that I applaud the level of compassion it takes to temporarily house such a creature with the hopes of finding it's owners....but it was just too funny at 8:30 this morning...before my coffee.....

I try to be a good friend...

I don't know what I've done in life to find myself down this road. I have done my best at making choices in friends and associates. Kept my distance when I felt out of place. I have even forgiven the mistakes of those whom hurt me the worst, even when I knew I shouldn't.

I find now, that I am learning what a true friend is. And that I don't have many. I try my hardest to be supportive, honest and a shoulder. I am in no way perfect, but I try...and once again it has gotten me hurt. Only this time, 20 years hangs in the balance. Some things are minor and petty~ I'll be the first to admit, to some, this is simply that. But when you have been there for EVERYTHING, forgiven EVERYTHING, NEVER ONCE be hateful or hurtful to someone...then just be replaced. Pushed aside...it's devastating. I had someone ask me a very honorable question on Friday...I said yes. I was honored...then today with no warning...thrown under the bus like an old gum wrapper.

At what point do we cut our losses and say goodbye? I don't know, I can't answer that, as you can see, I'm not good at doing that. I continue to stick around only to be abused again, and again. I told my husband tonight, "Sometimes it would be easier if I didn't love so much, if I didn't need my friends...but I do." I hate hurting like this. I haven't cried like this in a long time, and it sucks.

I guess 20 years of dedication means nothing anymore....

Not sure what this is all about.....

As of Tuesday, I am now 28. Yes, I am a woman and I just told my age. I do not believe that we should be ashamed of our age, or our wrinkles (don't have any yet but I'm sure they are right around the corner), or our grey hair (don't have that either). So many people are afraid to look "old". Personally I believe that having a bit of "age" to your appearance makes one look wise, experienced and appreciative. In our society, we are so wrapped up in eye cream, hair dye, nips, tucks and what ever else will erase our experience in the world. Why not embrace it and be proud that you have survived this long in reality!

So, here I sit at one o'clock in the morning. I have spent the last 4 hours or so cleaning. Cleaning out my desk from beneath the pile of TREES that had grown on top. I kid you not, there was a good 14 inches of paper stacked from one end to the other...then the overflow was on top of the filing cabinet. I guess it would have been too easy to actually file it IN the massive cabinet! Anyways~ not only did I need to get the area cleaned, for my own sanity, but I'm starting a bit of a new job. EBAY. Yes, the wonderful Ebay...selling the crap that I don't want, or bought on clearence, to people who desperately need it! Isn't the internet Wonderful!? I have started small, 3 auctions. I am learning as I go and trying to start slowly as to not get overwhelmed. But I am having fun with it just the same. Thanks to Jules, who is showing me the ropes! We are hell-bent on becoming professional "Scooner-to-EBAY" millionaires. Ok, maybe not millionaires, but paying a couple small bills every month around the house would be wonderful. And all in the comfort of my own home. I've already had people as me to sell their stuff for a cut of the profit! This could get exciting pretty quick. Let's pray it takes.

(Not that you really needed or cared to know any of this but it's all I've got right now and I am overdue to post....)

She's a little me....

Goodness, Ashtyn is so funny. She's so goofy. She's so....ME! I see a lot of myself in the things that she does. I can understand her thought patterns behind her actions, because at one time, they were mine. And sometimes she does things just to make you smile or laugh. That was me....so for her to give me the gift of a smile today, here's what she did while waiting for the bus.....

I don't quite know how my parents didn't just die laughing on a daily basis. Her main goal in life is a lot like mine at that age. If someone isn't happy, do your best to help them get happy. Even if it's only for a moment, a smile is all they need. It's nice to know that she is so caring, and I know she is, because she is a little me.

And I lost it.....

Here's a shock for you. Two blog posts, back to back....well, I promised I'd post with regards to Ashtyn's first day. It's great. I was miserable. I took her to a breakfast of sorts at the school for the new class of kids coming in and to say our final goodbyes. This is to cut down on the parental stragglers in the classroom I'm sure!She was a bit nervous that she couldn't remember her teachers name, and that she wouldn't make any friends but I assured her that she would learn names and friends all in good time. Sooner than she thought! The principal said her welcomes and hellos then told all of the students to line up with their teachers. One last hug and kiss (she was holding on as tight as I was!) and she was off. She couldn't find the line but once mom fixed that problem, she was good to go. I lost it. My little girl is growing up and I can't begin to fathom her daily trials without me. All I can do now is my best to teach her well at home and pick up any pieces along the way...Man, Kindgergarten is tough!

Guilty as Charged....

Ok, so I am guilty. I have been told by MANY people that I am letting my blog fall by the way-side. I am not posting enough. I KNOW I KNOW, I'M BAD! Perhaps I can start fresh today, and try to post once a week, at least. I have lots to post about but no time. So, I make time! hmmmm, since last post a lot has happened. I spent the weekend in TN with two friends. It was wonderful! Ari was a wonderful hostess and Jules was just a peach. (Although she spent far too much time with her new fiance')

Time passed quickly on the porch with cold drinks and chatting it up about nothing and everything all at the same time. We solved the problems of the world and enjoyed doing so with a giggle! Minutes turned to hours and night into day seemlessly~making it harder to leave on Sunday. Monday proved to be a joke, trying to fall back into a routine and catch up on house work. YEA~Right....that evening we did get to meet Ashtyn's teacher and see her classroom.

I'm still dealing with it all just fine. I'm sure it won't really hit me until tomorrow when I walk out of the building and leave her behind. Just thinking about it now is gettting me a bit, I must confess. As for Lily~ yesterday I was changing some laundry over and things got quiet upstairs. Ashtyn and I were talking when we realized that Lily had been too quiet for too long! Racing up the stairs we find Lil with my lipstick. And to my shock...applied very well for a 2year old. Goodness they grow up fast!

I guess I should sign off here....I know tomorrow will bring a whole new batch of emotions that I should post....if I have the time.